Not Role play. Just me.
Hi! I just read your post on what makes a great Dom. That was a great answer - it should be in the textbook ;) But seriously, I think wisdom like that should be more easily accessible, because it seems that there are a lot of folks who have a wrong idea of what a Dom is. They just like the idea of somebody serving their whim. Anyway…You ended by saying: ” the best Doms inspire the sub to serve” I know it’s not an easy, or perhaps even possible question to answer, but I need to ask, because as a Dom, I don’t know what it’s like to be inspired to serve. I need to understand that need so I can tap into it and bring it to life. I know this is a long question, and a difficult one. but I need to understand what goes on in the mind and heart of a submissive. And after reading that post, you seem like the right person to ask - wise and eloquent. But I’d understand if you don’t answer

(I answered privately, but I’m posting for others to read) 

It’s not a difficult question.  You are over-thinking. 

You don’t need to think of it as about being inspired to serve.  It’s not a deep, mystical thing that you have to wrap your mind around.  Think about what it feels like to be inspired to do *anything.*  It’s really about fueling a motivation.  To get to the heart of that, you need to think about what motivates your sub in general. 

It’s about a connection.  It’s about knowing what makes your sub tick.  It’s about paying attention to the cues about what kind of service your sub enjoys providing, what is comforting, encouraging, calming etc…it’s truly no more complicated than paying attention to the person you are with.  This is not something related to D/s specifically, this is about being in tune with the person you are in a relationship with.  

For example, if you like your mate to cook for you and you want to inspire them to cook more creative dishes, you might say something like, “Baby, that meal was delicious!  I truly appreciate it when you take the time to cook that way for me.  Every time you try something new, it’s something I truly enjoy.”  If your with someone who thrives off of verbal affirmation, then you just created a mood where they may feel very much like doing that for you again.  

If you are with someone who struggles with being easily overwhelmed and you want them to turn to you for guidance, then each time you see that frazzled crazy person in front of you, say something calming…pull them into you and tell them you are there.  The next time something is going on, they are more likely to confide in you.  

You see what I’m getting at?  

This is not nearly as complex as people make it.  The best Doms are incredibly observant.  Pay attention and you will see what makes your sub come to life.  You don’t have to experience what it’s like to want to serve to know what it feels like to be inspired.  Try not to over-complicate things. 

I appreciate that you felt I could help you with this, and thanks for asking.  :-)


It’s 11:57pm don’t make pancakes now.


I think it’s super intimate.  Shaving a man’s face is one of the sexiest things I’ve ever done.  I also know of guys who have shaved their girl’s pubic area and they have said the same thing.  For the people who are always worried about getting cut,  I always wonder why they think their partner wouldn’t be anything more than very gentle.  I mean, I have to shave my pussy, and I don’t have the benefit of seeing all the areas while I do.  I would think my man could do a better job.  Additionally, barbers shave with straight razors…but I’m digressing, lol.

But anyway, there’s something so hot about him concentrating and making sure not to cut me.  Having his hands all over my pussy while he carefully shaves me…telling me to stay still.  Rinsing me off and running his hands all over me when he’s finished.  

The closeness and trust needed with something like this is just so sexy. 




lmfao me